October 2025

We had a dreadful experience in this extremely self-important place. We were over a week in an air B&B in this touristy town, which turned out to be quite pleasant because we were able to travel the lake by ferry and visit other towns. There was only one Michelin-mentioned restaurant in Bellagio, this was it, and so what the hell we decided to have dinner there on our last night in town.

It’s an extremely fancy high-class hotel where ordinary rooms go for C$1200 and up, with this also very fancy restaurant and bar downstairs. We were welcomed most formally by multiple staff in livery suits and shown to a table overlooking the evening water. The first encounter with the senior waiter was again very formal. In years gone by we’ve had a few dinners at Michelin three star places and this guy’s behaviour was like we were in one of those eateries, enjoying  a generous helping of sneer and implied doubt about what the fuck WE were doing there.

The prices on the menu were breathtaking. We could see we would be spending many hundreds of dollars in euros but decided to hang in there hoping for some real treats. When we requested to share a starter and have a pasta each the waiter told us we needed to have two dishes each. I’m embarrassed to say I lost it at that point and gave him a piece of my mind, embarrassing my lovely wife and (realizing what I had said along lines of we can pay your ridiculous prices but don’t want six courses) myself too. Waiter went and checked with the manager as I requested who let us break the rules. Very generous…

The food turned out to be ordinary. Our shared starter marinated wild scallop carpaccio, mushrooms, fried shrimps, sour plum and gren apple sauce was really just flavorless and about three bites each for €65. Robin’s second course, €55 ditalini with orange tomato, fermented apricot, bottarga, and burrata cream she said had nice flavour but was lukewarm. My linguine with scampi, green olives, zucchini, and celery was pretty ordinary although adequately seasoned, but at €65 was on a par with pasta we’d had in the little sidewalk places in town for about €15.

The wine was just fine and the somellier was the only normally-behaved staff member we ran into, laughing about high prices in Burgundy and giving us useful advice about the adequate chianti classico we ordered.

What a contrast between the million-dollar physical plant and food service show here and the quality of the food. It’s hard to imagine having enough money to stay in the hotel and still not seeing through the falsehood in the dining room. Because they’re still in business such people obviously exist.

Nobody I know would or should go anywhere near this place and I was doubly embarrassed by being reeled in like a big fish and making a fool of myself letting them know what I thought. Avoid at all costs.

Food 7.2, service, well if you like the arrogant charade it would be wonderful but I would say about 6.2, ambience, again the feeling of the place was practically embarrassing in its extreme opulence: love it or hate it, value 2.0, peace and quiet irrelevant.